Change is an inevitable part of life. The important part is knowing that there are parts of our lives we can change and the parts we cannot. It’s simple: focus our time and energy on the parts of life we can change and accepts the parts of life we cannot. If we are not satisfied with a part of our life, we have the power to change it. The hard part is encouraging people to see that and know that change is possible, no matter how far off you may be.
What are things we have no control over? What are things we cannot change?
· The weather – We have no control over the weather, so there is no use in complaining about it, only accept it. Make the best of a bad weather day.
· What other people think – We cannot change what other people think. We cannot control what others think of ourselves. We can only control what we think about ourselves.
· What other people do – We have no control over other people’s actions. There is nothing we can do to make someone act a certain way or do a certain thing. We only have control over our actions.
· The past – We cannot control the past. We can only control our present actions. The past is in the past. There is no going back. Dwelling on the past causes regret for many people. Accept the past and move on. Regret is not something you want to hold onto.
· Getting old – Aging is inevitable. We cannot control time. We cannot make it go faster or slow down. Aging is a part of life that we have no control over. The best thing to do is enjoy where you are in your lifetime, and enjoy the years as they come. Aging is a way to remind us that time is precious and we should not waste it.
· Our family – We do not have a choice in the family we are born into. No matter what, you will always be linked to them whether we like it or not. In order to find peace, you need to accept your family for who they are, whether they are in your life or not. That does not mean you tolerate abuse. Family is not always blood.
· Where we came from – We cannot change our background. We cannot change how we were raised. We cannot change how our parents, teachers, peers, or anyone treated us in the past. Where we come from does not limit us from what we can become and achieve.
· People who have wronged us – Carrying the weight of someone who has wronged us will never get any lighter until you learn to let it go. Accept what has happened, learn from it, and move on. Carrying baggage of past hurts only weighs you down. The more weight you carry, the harder it is to fly.
· Change itself – Change itself is inevitable. Many of the emotional disorders today come from people not able to accept change. Some are terrified of change which causes them to cling to what they want to keep. There is nothing we can do about change except accept it. The sooner we accept the fact that everything changes, the less we cling.
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